The boy’s finally decided on what they wanted to be for Halloween (after several mind changes), the costumes were bought, and trick-or-treating was done. The boys (and parents) fell into a sugar coma, and the next morning we woke up to….. Christmas? It was like over night the magical elves took over all retail stores and campaign ads turned to toy ads galore! We had completely skipped over Thanksgiving.

I usually start November with my ‘thankful’ posts on FB but just didn’t feel like participating in that this year. What I did do, which is shocking even to myself, is start Christmas shopping. I have fully gotten into the Christmas cheer… Hallmark channel has been on pretty much non-stop…. Christmas decor has been purchased… and our family Christmas bucket list has started to take shape.

I thought that maybe I will use my blog to give thanks for what has been given to me:

I am thankful for date nights. A time for my husband and I to reconnect as husband and wife. I time to laugh, a time to talk, or a time to just sit in each other’s presence without being interrupted.

I am thankful for my children. I learn something new each day from these two. I am blessed with their unique personalities, their love for each other. I am thankful for the moments when they just want their mommy and for the moments I just want some quiet!!

I am thankful for old memories. The ones that were difficult and heartbreaking; and those that taught me about love, kindness, and friendship.

I am thankful for new memories and for friendships that last a life time.

I am thankful for new friendships. I am thankful that God has placed women in my life that have been uplifting and have a heart for Jesus.

I am thankful for my family. I am blessed with a husband who loves me unconditionally, and an extended family, that despite my many shortcomings, wouldn’t have me any other way.

It has been through a recent Bible study and a few sermons (shout out to Pastor Roy :p) that I have realized that the merge of Thanksgiving and Christmas makes complete sense to me.

I have so many things and people to be thankful for because of  Jesus. What better way to celebrate Thanksgiving than to give thanks to the Lord for His Son, who through Him we have everlasting life? What better way to prepare our hearts as we remember His birth?

‘Give thanks with a grateful heart, give thanks to the Holy One, give thanks because He’s given Jesus Christ, His Son.’  (song titled Give Thanks)

So I’m going to start taking a different approach and way of thinking when it comes to this holiday season; instead of complaining of how Christmas is pushed upon me, I’m going to start taking the time to give thanks to the Lord for all He has given me…. especially, the greatest Gift of All, my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. 

By His grace,

Misty

A note to the reader:

I published this post on November 13, 2016. At that time, our country was divided over the Presidential selections. Now, 4 years later, we are in the same condition. Divided.

Thank you for reading. – Misty

The last two days I have been glancing at my computer and trying to ignore the nudge of writing on my blog. I usually use this as an outlet for my feelings, circumstances, frustrations, basically a journal of my life. So, it is curious as to why I could not bring myself to the keyboard.

This week has been a rough one in my country. I have found it so incredibly difficult to put into words how I am feeling, my fears, and my hopes. It almost seems impossible to express anything on social media, despite the best intentions, without having the wolves come at you. Honestly, I’m typing this now without a clue as to the title and after sending up a prayer for the Lord’s guidance in what I type and that it may glorify Him.

The scripture read today at church came from Luke 6:35-38:

“But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”(emphasis added)

My pastor spoke about the current protests going on in our country, as well as, the fear among our fellow neighbors. How even, in the small farming community I live, there are families who have sought out our church to see if we could be a safe haven for them. They are scared.

The above scripture is a call to Christians; but it goes even beyond that. Although, I am a Christian and believe Jesus is my Lord and Savior, I know there are those out there who do not have my belief system. I know some of these people personally, they are my friends and family, and I love them very much. They also, are great, loving and compassionate people.

I believe it is a call to humanity to love your enemies, lend and give to them without expecting any thing in return. We all should be merciful. We should not judge or condemn and we all need to forgive. 

The rhetoric between Americans, on both sides, is deplorable. The protests that are anything but peaceful, are wrong. The name calling of ‘cry babies’ and telling those who are legitimately hurting to ‘suck it up’, is wrong. The continued sharing of memes disrespecting our current president and our president-elect is wrong. The list can go on and on and on. Not one of these behaviors glorify our Lord. Not one of these behaviors show people God’s love.

It doesn’t matter who you supported and your reasons behind it. It doesn’t matter who won or who didn’t win. Why? Because NOONE can control how you respond to someone else, except you. Your behaviors, actions, words, and responses only speak to your own character and where your heart lies. 

I pray for healing for our nation. I pray for the hateful words to cease and be replaced by words of encouragement and love. I pray that we stop pointing fingers and casting out judgments and instead start opening our minds, hearts, and arms to people in our communities.

I am going to end with extending the earlier scripture and using The Message version. This is Luke 6: 27-38:

“Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them! If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that. If you only help those who help you, do you expect a medal? Garden-variety sinners do that. If you only give for what you hope to get out of it, do you think that’s charity? The stingiest of pawnbrokers does that. 

I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind. Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are down; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people; you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing.

Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”

Call this a follow up to a previous blog, an apology post, or my therapy session; it doesn’t really matter at this point, I just need to write about it.

You may recall my post, “Are Parents the New Goliath of Youth Sports?”, if not, then you may want to read it before this one. Why? Because I feel like I had the Goliath moment, and I am not proud of it.

So here comes the story that makes me human, who isn’t perfect, in need of forgiveness, and is asking for just that…..

Our last game of the season had just ended; and like every other game, the team meets with the coaches for final thoughts. I was all smiles in that moment. We had lost, but the last two games our boys had played were the best of the entire season. These kids had played their hearts out. I was proud of each of them and was taking some last minute pictures of the team as they took a knee.

The team and coaches finally broke apart and the kids started to disperse to their parents. A few parents offered handshakes to the coaches; this was a nice moment. This season had been difficult as a parent and coach’s wife. It wasn’t because of our record or any of the kids… it was difficult because of a few parents. I had prided myself on holding my tongue the last four months because that was a huge accomplishment for me. I have always struggled with keeping my emotions in check! I also refused to stoop to that level…or did.

Here comes the ugly part….

As I was standing there, waiting on my husband and two boys, and watching the handshakes; a parent took that moment to confront one of the coaches about something I was unaware had taken place during the game. All I saw, was my two sons standing there, and the coach being confronted, who was holding his own child. I truly had the best intentions. I asked them to stop it… to just stop. That there were kids around and if they need to talk to a coach to take it some place away from the kids. I even said ‘shame on all you adults’. Well….lets just say I was then the target. I stooped to their level and lost my cool. I called the family a name and said that they should move on from the program.  Words were exchanged, two men actually postured up to me, and my husband had to step in between only to be threatened.

I broke on the ride home….not because of what a few people said to me; but because how I responded was wrong and my children and other families witnessed it all. I have taught my children the importance of respect, kindness, extending grace and forgiveness, and keeping anger in check.

Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end. -Proverbs 29:11

Although my intentions were good, I allowed my anger to speak for me… four months worth, in fact. As I let the sobs out, my oldest reached forward from the backseat and put his arms around me. I apologized to him. I told him I was sorry for what I had said and what he had witnessed, and I asked for his forgiveness. My nine year old, who is wise beyond his years, said

“Mommy, I forgive you. You did the right thing. You saw someone being bullied and wanted to protect them. I am not going to let you go mommy.”

I was overwhelmed in that moment. Later, I spoke to my son again, and explained that even when standing up for someone, you must not give into your anger.

This morning I woke up to my inner negative dialog. The one telling me that I’m not worthy…look at what you did…you should be ashamed. Normally, I would grab a blanket and a bag of chips, and allow those lies to wash over me the entire day. I asked myself, ‘Can I get a do over?’ That’s when I realized, I can.

I went to my Holy Father. I actually humbled myself before the Lord and knelt down with my head in my hands. I asked for His forgiveness, I forgave those involved, and I prayed that they would find it in their hearts to forgive me. The weight lifted and I felt the sense of warmth surround me…almost like a hug.

My do over happened the moment God allowed me another day. Another day to do better.

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. -James 4:10

By His grace,

Misty